Wonder Woman’s Tips to Save the World

Tonight was the VAGINA monologues. Yes, I said VAGINA.

 Tonight my family came (mom, dad, aunt, g-mom) all the way to Columbia, MO to watch me scream “VAGINA mother fuckers” on stage and talk about my Angry Vag. My dad listened to me talk about how “women would be cominnnnnng alllll day long,” and how my vagina “wants chocolate.” Do you know why he listened to these things? Because, he’s awesome and they’re important. My family joined me, and hundreds of other people tonight, as we took a step toward ending violence against women. 

I’ve decided to help the rest of the universe out, and I’ve compiled 5 ways to save the world according to me (Wonder Woman). 

1. Women are awesome as women. We’re not bitches or hoes. We’re not “the weaker sex.” We’re not catty little girls. We are women, and there should be respect associate with being a woman.

2. VAGINA is awesome. I have honestly never seen anyone else’s VAGINA, but mine’s pretty damn awesome, so I figure that’s universal. Also, VAGINA should be respected always. Not just if she’s a virgin, not just if she’s pretty, not just if she’s skinny, ALWAYS. 

3. Change is a short word, but difficult to do. Tonight over a thousand people gathered, which is a great start towards change, but the real change in society comes when we take what we learned tonight and take it to the “real world” and start correcting people’s language, and negative thought processes towards women. 

4. Rape is not a joke. It’s not funny. It’s not something to be used in common, everyday conversation, unless you are referencing it as the violent, life altering act that it is. For example, that test did not “rape you.” Expand your vocabulary, there are plenty of other ways to say that you failed. 

5. If every given the chance to be a Super Hero DO IT! If you ever get a chance to make a difference in your community/someone’s life DO IT. It’s not difficult. You see a need and you meet it! Put that cape, and those spandex on, and rock it out. STOP expecting everyone else to take action, because if everyone waits then SHIT doesn’t get done. 

Well, those are some of my tips on how to save the world. So remember! Say no to rape, VAGINA hate, disrespect, and laziness. If you need some spandex or a cape to borrow let me know, because we have work to do. 

Until next VAGINA season (when I’ll have to renew my VAGINA license).

VAGINA mother fuckers